Why It Sucks When Your Therapist Character Sucks

One of the awesomest things about the #WeNeedDiverseBooks movement is that people are writing more about mental illness for teens—both sick kids and sick parents. At a time when Mental Health Parity is still working itself out, it’s great that kids can at least go to a bookstore and find someone giving voice to their stories.

But here’s a trend that’s still sucking ducks:

Many of the therapists in these stories are incompetent. I’m seeing it a lot in the works I’m editing but also in books I review, and even among my CPs who know I’m a full-time therapist in addition to being a writer. Either the therapist isn’t really listening, they’re hyper-judgmental, taking the parent’s side, or—and this boggles my mind to know end—they’re crossing boundaries and developing inappropriate dual relationships with their adolescent clients.

It’s not just that lousy therapists have been done to death for years now, though that’s also true. It’s the tropiest trope that ever troped when writing about mental health or addictions.

And, just to be clear, because maybe doesn’t hit home for people who aren’t involved in this field professionally—in real life if a therapist has a sexual relationship with a client they would lose their license. Forever. A license that takes over 1000 hours of unpaid work to earn. A license we pay hundreds of dollars annually in malpractice insurance to keep. And oddly enough during the multiple years we spend shelling out thousands of dollars on tuition, books, lodging, and highlighter pens, we’re actually educated in the fact that fucking people who trust you with their mental health is a bad idea.

Shocking, I know.

But in addition to being not terribly reflective of the real world, when you write sucky therapists in books targeted at teens, you need to remember your intended audience.

When the therapist in your YA/NA novel sucks, it sends the message to teens that they can’t trust mental health professionals. For some kids, particularly those with pervasive mental illness, therapy and/or medication are the only way they are going to recover. Schizophrenia has no cure. Addiction is rarely surmountable without ongoing support from a professional, or sometimes a network of professionals. Untreated depression is one of the leading causes of death for people under the age of 25. 

These are facts backed by research, guys.

And speaking of research, it never ceases to amaze me how writers will embark upon the journey of writing a clinician without ever having talked to one. I’m not suggesting that everyone who writes about mental illness needs to shell out two hundred bucks for an hour on the couch. (For the record, I have never had a couch in any of my offices.) But pick up the phone or send an email. Spend some time on a few websites aimed at psychiatrists, psychologists, therapists, or social workers. (Do you know the difference? If not, you shouldn’t be writing about them!)

Here’s the bottom line: Are there therapists that suck? Yup. I work with a couple. But there are also a lot of excellent, competent professional helpers who are saving lives every day. Substantially more in real life, I’d say, than there are in the literature.

And for the love of fuck, stop writing NA where your main character ends up marrying her therapist. We do not think of patients as romantic prospects. I promise. For us, dating a client is akin idea of marrying a cousin with no teeth.

Be authentic. I’m just saying.

Agree or disagree? Feel free to share your thoughts below.

Fangirl Friday: Promise Me Something by Sara Kocek

Fangirl Friday is a feature here on the blog where I talk about kickass reads and what I like about them. And this time, I'm also including a giveaway courtesy of the author and the awesome people at Albert Whitman Teen. Stay tuned for more info at the end of this post! 

PROMISE ME SOMETHING by Sara Kocek

Author's Website   Goodreads   Twitter   Facebook

ARC from Albert Whitman Teen in exchange for an honest review. e-Books are made available via Open Road Media.

Pub Date: September 1, 2013

Dannie says: Promise me you'll read this one because it's just so good. 

Book Blurb:

As if starting high school weren't bad enough, Reyna Fey has to do so at a new school without her best friends. Reyna's plan is to keep her head down, help her father recover from the car accident that almost took his life, and maybe even make some friends. And then Olive Barton notices her. Olive is not exactly the kind of new friend Reyna has in mind. The boys make fun of her, the girls want to fight her, and Olive seems to welcome the challenge. There's something about Olive that Reyna can't help but like. But when Reyna learns Olive's secret, she must decide whether it's better to be good friends with an outcast or fake friends with the popular kids. . . .before she loses Olive forever.

Just for starters let me say that despite having to be up at 7AM with the one-year-old, once I started reading this around midnight, I didn't put it down until I finished. The next morning hurt.

Worth it.

What I liked:

Tim, for starters. He ended up being one of my favorite characters. I would have loved to see Reyna become friends with him earlier in the book. As is, it felt like she was using him to a certain extent, and I would have liked to see their relationship grow more gradually.

I liked and wanted more denouement where Reyna's feelings of guilt were concerned. I think survivor's guilt and self-blame is a huge factor when teens' friends attempt or commit suicide. And I would have liked more "on-screen" resolution as far as that went. But that's the therapist in me more than the reader.

I also dug the way the subject matter was handled. I felt that Reyna's reactions to the sexual identity issues that came into play were very authentic and courageous on the author's part, though I did not always follow her thought process.

What I loved:

First and foremost, the characters. I loved Reyna's journey as far as identifying the values and characteristics she wanted in people she called friends. I liked that none of the characters were cookie-cutter-cliches. Even the minor players were multi-faceted. I especially felt that Reyna was a very tangible and sympathetic MC, and I enjoyed reading her story.

As a mom and a therapist, I felt that Kocek did a great job of confronting the realities of suicidal ideation in one's friends without crossing the line into preaching. And I think it's super important that the book addressed the legal consequences of some of Olive's choices. That's not something I've seen done much in YA and I was glad to see it here. And while I wasn't surprised at the plot twists, I think that's writer and adult bias that won't apply to much of Kocek's target audience.

Finally, I loved that Reyna's values were portrayed in a way that was fair and allowed her to be a character either side of the aisle could rally behind. I think when we see conservative/moderate teens in YA, they tend to be portrayed in an extremist way that isn't an accurate reflection of these youth. And I loved that part of Reyna's journey included a though exploration of her own belief system.

What I wanted more of: WARNING SECTION CONTAINS SPOILERS

I felt like it was too convenient for Levi's parents to be gay. I also think his perspective would have made more impact were that not the case. Instead, it almost seems like the only people who empathize with gay kids in this read are other gay teens and teens with gay parents. That probably was true about five to ten years ago, but that's not my experience with the teens I see at work.

I wasn't crazy about the way things were resolved between Reyna and her parents. My reading left the impression that Reyna's dad and would-be-stepmom were right about everything and Reyna's feelings were invalid, which I found to be both unrealistic and inaccurate. For me, the better ending would have been one without resolution. Sometimes our parents do things we don't understand, things that feel really unfair, and we don't have to agree with them or apologize for our feelings. We just have to learn how to deal.

I wanted more resolution where the besties were concerned. Not externally with the girls themselves so much as within Reyna. It felt, for me, like a loose end.

I wanted to be in Reyna's head a little more where the sexual identity issues were concerned. Like I said before, I loved that we saw a character arc that included her questioning and identifying her own moral code. But I feel like, particularly in a late Middle Grade or young YA book, that sexual identity is a major developmental issue, and I would have liked to see Reyna's cognitive dissonance regarding the conflict between her faith and her friends' sexual identity. Despite Olive confronting her on the matter, I didn't feel like we experienced Reyna's thought process enough there.


Short story long:

I really loved this book. I think the perspective is original, the characters are complex and engaging, and the plot has some great twists and turns. The pace is just right, and the social concerns are handled in a way that is both age-appropriate and pertinent to today's young readers. Good stuff, people! Add it to your Goodreads and pre-order now via the links below.

Tomorrow you can check out another review and giveaway over at The Random Thoughts of Crazy Mandy and an interview with Sara at Starry-Eyed Heart Book Blog. You can find the entire roster of blogs included in the Sara Squared Book Tour HERE. And don't forget to enter the rafflecopter drawing to win an autographed copy of this kickass read! (Sorry international peeps--USA and Canada only for the raffle on this one.)

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Fangirl Friday: Review: A Really Awesome Mess by Trish Cook and Brendan Halpin

Fangirl Friday is--get this--when I fangirl out over books I've read that I think you'll love, too.



A REALLY AWESOME MESS by Trish Cook & Brendan Halpin

ARC from Egmont USA

Pub Date: July 23, 2013

Dannie says: Not a mess. Just awesome. 

Goodreads   Amazon    B & N    Indiebound

Book Blurb:

A hint of Recovery Road, a sample of Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, and a cut of Juno. A Really Awesome Mess is a laugh-out-loud, gut-wrenching/heart-warming story of two teenagers struggling to find love and themselves.

Two teenagers. Two very bumpy roads taken that lead to Heartland Academy.

Justin was just having fun, but when his dad walked in on him with a girl in a very compromising position, Justin's summer took a quick turn for the worse. His parents' divorce put Justin on rocky mental ground, and after a handful of Tylenol lands him in the hospital, he has really hit rock bottom.

Emmy never felt like part of her family. She was adopted from China. Her parents and sister tower over her and look like they came out of a Ralph Lauren catalog-- and Emmy definitely doesn't. After a scandalous photo of Emmy leads to vicious rumors around school, she threatens the boy who started it all on Facebook.

Justin and Emmy arrive at Heartland Academy, a reform school that will force them to deal with their issues, damaged souls with little patience for authority. But along the way they will find a ragtag group of teens who are just as broken, stubborn, and full of sarcasm as themselves. In the end, they might even call each other friends.

Books related to mental illness auto-rocket to the top of my TBR list because they combine two of my top interests--reading and screwed up kids. But up until now, the majority I've read left me bitter and ranty. With mental illness among adolescents on the rise and school districts around the country cutting funding for support services, I think the YA industry has done these kids hella disservice by portraying treatment and therapists as a joke or, even worse, as a scam. Sure there are shady places that claim they help kids, but in my experience, they're in the minority. I've been more than a little discomforted to see books for written teens portraying therapy in such a negative way. 

So, straight up, I was a hardcore skeptic going into this read. I was wary and defensive and I went into the read expecting to be disappointed. On authenticity alone, this book is AMAZING, you guys. It presents residential treatment for teens the way it really is, and I can say that as someone who spent years working in the trenches. I loved that the main characters were truly flawed without being stereotypical. 

Beyond that, Cook and Halpin are an all-star team when it comes to authentic teen voice, witty dialogue, and all around good storytelling. I read this from start to finish in less than 24 hours while juggling a one-year-old and a major revision deadline.

If I had to nitpick, I'd say that I felt the storyline strayed a little more than I like from the main characters at times, but really that's a nitpick. The therapist in me would have liked more emotional growth out of Justin's character, but at the same time I think that goes back to his authenticity. Therapy and change are hard, and the reality is not everyone proceeds at the same pace. I think if Justin had a more perfect character arc the story would have been less believable. I guess I'm saying in that respect I'm disappointed in a good way? 

I read a couple crits on Goodreads that argued that the ending is unrealistic, but having worked in treatment, I can sincerely say it's not. These things absolutely do happen because teens are good at being teens. No disbelief to suspend there as far as I'm concerned. And that's all I'll say because I'm a stickler about spoilers. 

As for me, I'm giving this one 5 big shiny gold stars. Pre-order online or pick it up at your local indie bookstore when it arrives on July 23rd. 

Has anyone read this yet? What did you think?